What one act will develop both the emotional intelligence and the future academic success of your child?
You only get one guess. (I bet you guessed right.)
Research has repeatedly demonstrated that reading aloud to your children helps them develop empathy and compassion. Picture books offer your children insight into the perspective of others as well as encouraging them to examine their own emotions.
Today I am sharing a book list of some of the best picture books that support the development of emotional intelligence in children (and perhaps their adult readers, too!). Many believe that emotional intelligence is a stronger prediction of future success in life than academic achievement. Lucky for us, reading aloud nurtures both!
(Note: this post contains affiliate links that earn from qualifying purchases.)
So go ahead and spend a little extra time with your child and a stack of books. You are doing a good thing!
Table of Contents
Overwhelming Emotions
Keep Your Head Up by Aliya King Neil, illustrated by Charly Palmer
I was blown away by this book. The narrative teaches kids that even when we have extra lousy days and our moods seem to control us, we can show ourselves grace and forgive ourselves. D is having a bad day. Everything seems to be going wrong and his frustrations eventually leads to a meltdown at school. But D reminds himself to "keep his head up" because everyone can have a bad day. A fantastic book for social emotional learning. Truly wonderful and a must for every child’s bookshelf.
Nina in That Makes Me Mad by Hilary Knight, based on a book by Steven Kroll
This is a graphic novel from the Toon Book series, which is great for beginning readers but also satisfying to read aloud. A lot of things make Nina mad and she tells everyone exactly how she feels: MAD! I liked the way this book refraines from moralizing. It is perfectly acceptable for Nina to express her feelings and my younger son really responded to this book for that very reason. For each thing that makes Nina mad, such as "when you don't let me help," or "when I try and it doesn't work" there is a short vignette showing an example from Nina's life. The solution to big feelings is wonderfully simple–Nina explains that she feels better when she is allowed to tell her parents when she is mad.
Grumpy Bird by Jeremy Tankard
This book is so, so funny (and accurate!). When Grumpy Bird wakes up, he is grumpy! Grumpy, grumpy, grumpy. Too grumpy to do anything, even fly, so he walks along in his grumpy mood. As he passes each of his friends, he snaps at them but they join him anyway and the grumpy walk turns into a sort of follow the leader game and Grumpy Bird can't help but let friendship and fun turn his frown upside down.
MORE: Picture Books About Anger and Grumpiness
Benji, the Bad Day, and Me by Sally J. Pla, illustrated by Ken Min
Every kid (and grown-up) has to deal with a bad day, or lots of bad days, really. Sammy has a really, really bad day. It seems like everything is going wrong and not only that, but his autistic brother, Benji is also experiencing a rough day. Sammy notices that Benji has a special place just for him when he starts feeling overwhelmed but Sammy doesn't have a spot like that. Benji notices Sammy's sadness and helps his brother out with the aid of a blue blanket. This heartwarming book teaches kids how having a go-to spot can help them self-regulate and the positive power of connection with others (especially family).
Jabari Jumps (series) by Gaia Cornwall
I love young Jabari! Having a growth mindset means facing your fears, even if it takes a little extra time, and a bit of loving encouragement. Jabari thinks he is ready for the diving board, but it is such a big step! His dad lets him know that it's okay to feel scared and Jabari takes the time he needs and he finally does it! Part of breaking out a fixed mindset is accepting that some things might be scary but they are still worth doing.
MORE: Books About Perseverance
Grief and Sadness
The Rabbit Listened by Cori Doerrfeld
Taylor (the child's gender is ambiguous) is building a block tower when a bird comes and knocks it over. Taylor is very upset and several animals come over to try and fix the situation. They go about it all wrong, however. They shout, vow revenge, or try to dismiss Taylor's grief–not exactly comforting. The rabbit, however, listens and allows Taylor to experience an entire range of emotions over the loss of his tower. I absolutely adored this book and parents will learn a good lesson for themselves when reading it, too!
When Sadness is at Your Door by Eva Eland
This is a lovely book that teaches kids that accepting sadness is part of life. Sadness, represented by the blue-green form, comes into a child's home and stays for a while, accompanying the child in all their daily activities. The overall message is not to be afraid of sadness, but to acknowledge it, name it and experience it. A wonderful, gentle book that every child should have read to them.
A Blue Kind of Day by Rachel Tomlinson, illustrated by Tori-Jay Mordey
Author Tomlinson tackles a child's feelings of depression and the confusing emotions that it can produce. An Indigenous Australian boy takes to his bed during a difficult day. He doesn't understand how to handle his "tangled" feelings. His parents show him patience and compassion, assuring him that his feelings are nothing to be ashamed of.
MORE: Picture books to help children understand death and grief
Relationships with Others
The Remember Balloons by Jessie Oliveros, illustrated by Dana Wulfekotte
All of grandpa's balloons represent memories. James loves those the memories but one day some of the balloons start to drift away. The balloons act as a metaphor for grandpa's memory loss and dementia, although it is never named as such. As grandpa's balloons fade, James begins to hold more balloons, and he sees that it is now his privilege to hold on to memories and share them with others. I was so impressed with the compassion in this book. Children don't necessarily need to have a loved one experiencing memory loss to appreciate the story.
The Fox on the Swing by Evelina Daciutè, illustrated by Aušra Kiudulaite
Translated from Lithuanian, this is a wonderfully whimsical tale of hope, friendship and happiness. Paul and his family live in a tree in a park and one day when Paul is on his way home from the bakery he meets a fox on a swing. Thus begins a rather interesting series of encounters with the philosophizing fox who creates just the right conditions for Paul to consider the nature of happiness and friendship. I love this book for encouraging emotional intelligence because the complex nature of the dialogue really challenges kids to consider the themes touched on in the story.
MORE: Children's Books About Happiness
Wallpaper by Thao Lam
In this mostly wordless tale, a girl moves into a new home. She spies a trio of friends in a treehouse and watches them with interest. But when they see her, she hides, unable to make the leap necessary to join them. Instead, she peels back a piece of the wallpaper and steps into an imaginary world. Her adventure inside this world helps her find the courage to make friends in the real world. Making new friends can be incredibly tough for some children, but even if it is easy for your kids, learning to develop empathy for those who struggle is an important step towards building a depth of emotional intelligence.
MORE: Children's Books About Standing Up for Others
Knowing Yourself
My Heart Is a Compass by Deborah Marcero
Rose is looking for something unique to bring to show and tell. She doesn’t know where to look so she uses her imagination and starts to draw maps to help her search for a treasure. She draws all kinds of maps, still thinking she can’t find something to share with her friends. So she takes her maps into show and tell and they turn out to be the treasure she was looking for. I’d say this picture book, with its marvelous illustrations, is the treasure you and your kids have been looking for!
MORE: Children's Books about Hope and Comfort
My Heart by Corrina Luyken
Beautiful, lilting rhymes describe the myriad of ways our hearts feel and how they change. Hearts can be open or closed, they can feel bright or shadowed. Luyken’s evocative charcoal illustrations add detail and charm. This book will resonate with all children (and parents, alike). Not to be missed.
MORE: Children's Books about Being Yourself
Not He or She, I'm Me! by A. M. Wild, illustrated by Kah Yangni
This book is for every child who doesn't want to be defined by stereotypical gender norms! A nonbinary child expresses their interests and describes their activities. The overall feeling is one of joy, creativity and discovery. I love the way this book normalizes a day in the life of a nonbinary child.
MORE: Books That Challenge Gender Stereotypes
Honesty and Ethics
The Lying King by Alex Beard
This picture book about a ruler who lies and lies and lies is quite the timely tale. When children lie (and they all do, eventually) they must deal with the emotions of guilt and regret, only then can they move forward. The Lying King's story is told in clever rhymes and depicts how lies snowball and ultimately catch their creator in a trap of his own making. The fate of the lying warthog will give your kids lots to think about. This picture book is a timeless story is important to share with your children and use as a springboard to discuss the value of truth.
MORE: Children's Books About Lying and Telling the Truth
I Want My Hat Back (series) by Jon Klassen
You may wonder why I have have this quirky, somewhat dark story on a list about books that teach emotional intelligence. Well, the sly narrative requires kids to engage their brains and debate ethical questions. Why does the story end the way it does? Is that right or wrong? Plus, encouraging kids to approach all kinds of narratives, both visual and linguistic, forthright or subtextual, builds reading comprehension and encourages an expansive view of the world.
MORE: Picture Books about Kindness
Gaining Perspective
They All Saw a Cat by Brendan Wenzel
This is such an interesting and extraordinary book that will get your children talking and thinking critically about what it means to have perspective and how perspective might influence our opinions and actions. The text is very simple, identifying who "saw a cat" and the illustration of the cat changes based on the viewer. How a child, a dog, a fish, etc. sees a cat is all different. This is a great picture book for teaching empathy and perspective, important factors in developing a strong emotional intelligence.
Life by Cynthia Rylant, illustrated by Brendan Wenzel
This picture book asks the reader to reflect on small moments of life. Brendan Wenzel's illustrations of the animals that take us on the journey are magnificent and exquisite. "What do you love about life?" Rylant asks as she proceeds to demonstrate the beauty of seemingly ordinary moments like a bird soaring. She asks us to trust the animals, and reminds us that although life is not always easy, it is always worth waking up for.
I'll Root For You and Other Poems by Edward van de Vendel, illustrated by Wolf Erlbruch
If you've ever had a child who hates losing, you know how difficult it can be to build their resilience and teach them the emotional skills they need to be a good and fair sport. This collection of poems will encourage kids to take winning and losing as it comes, celebrate the successes, but also understand and learn from the loses. The poems cheer on athletes as they keep trying to do their very best.
Zen Socks (series) by Jon J. Muth
Stillwater the Panda offers important lessons to his friends about the importance of kindness and empathy towards others. Stillwater tells the children three stories, about patience, sharing and compassion, helping them to learn how to be well-rounded individuals. Gentle humor and "ah ha" moments keep things from getting preachy and Muth's illustrations are marvelous as usual.
Shannon says
You might like to add How full is Your Bucket for Kids.
Tara Neville says
The Remember Balloons is one of the most beautiful books I've ever read to my children. Would have never found it without your booklists. Thank you!!!
Erica says
I'm so glad you enjoyed the book!