Does the title of this post seem a bit dramatic? I know what you are thinking. "Why would she ban dinner conversation? Actually, I want to encourage family dinner conversation! I want family bonding! I want to know what my kids do at school, help them get in touch with their feelings and all that jazz."
Look, I'm not against family dinner conversation. If you are already having delightful conversations with your family at dinner, good for you! Perhaps this post is not for you after all. Although my suggestion may come in handy for whatever your family's challenge is, so hear me out.
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What's Wrong with Dinner Conversations?
Forced dinner questions such as "How was your day?", "What did you do in school?" were not working for us. My older son wanted to read at the table and my younger son kept getting up. I've been working HARD on having calmer and kinder after-school afternoons with less yelling, more exercise and kinder moments, but it was all disintegrating at dinner. I needed to think outside the box.
First, let me say that we eat dinner early, around 5:00. I knew I had to bring something really interesting to the table (pardon the pun) in order to make dinnertime something to enjoy, not something to escape from. After all, I know all about why family meals are important.
MORE: Unplugged Ideas to Keep Kids Busy While You Cook Dinner
What to Do Instead of Dinner Conversation
I actually have an entire list of ideas for family dinner conversation activities that have been working for us, but today I'll focus on the biggest winner.
Our key dinnertime activity is something you may not expect. When I told my neighbor about it, she thought I was nuts, so I am expecting other parents to be slightly put off by the idea. However, it has been FUN and it has WORKED.
Ready?
Yup.
Am I crazy?
Well, yes. But that's another matter entirely.
Why Dinnertime Mad Libs?
Here are the benefits of doing Mad Libs at dinner:
1. The kids stay at the table. They want to hear the end result, of course!
2. It is funny. This year we are laughing together more and it is GREAT. Laughter puts everyone in a good mood and it may even make you smarter.
3. It's great for literacy. Your kids will learn about adjectives, adverbs and proper nouns in no time.
4. It's common ground. Who doesn't love Mad Libs?
5. The boys practice at taking turns. They may even listen to each other's suggestions for words and work together to think up a particularly funny sounding word.
6. It's something the kids have come to look forward to. They now associate dinner with FUN.
So, I realize Mad Libs may seem like an unconventional dinner activity, and perhaps I'm not really banning family dinner conversation after all. I'm just giving it a new twist. What do you think? Will you try it? Or am I just being silly? (Which is sort of the point, really.)
More help for parents to stay unplugged with their kids:
Lucy Mitchell says
I'm with you. I am SO sick of asking civil questions about school at the dinner table to be met with groans/silence/way worse. Might try this idea (although my kids are in the habit of using only toilet humour in Mad Libs.) Are we a lost cause? Maybe!
Erica MomandKiddo says
Well, my kids *might* (okay, they do) sometimes use bathroom words. But they can never repeat a word in the same mad lib so they run out pretty quick. 🙂
Melanie says
I think this is brilliant! My kids are still too young for Mad Libs, but we will definitely try this when they are older. I loved Mad Libs when I was a kid!
Erica MomandKiddo says
It's so fun and even if it doesn't work to do them at dinner, Mad Libs help in lots of other situations.
Catherine Johnson says
What a great idea! I already have a madlibs book somewhere. This might get them to sit at the table more.
Erica MomandKiddo says
It will!
Jen Robinson says
I like it! Sounds like fun stuff to me!
Erica MomandKiddo says
It's been really great and produced a lot of laughs!
becky m says
I love this idea. We do eat with my husband and it winds up being the two of us talking to each other since the kids never seem to want to participate. I will definitely try this!
Erica MomandKiddo says
Enjoy!
Natalie PlanetSmartyPants says
It's an interesting twist! We usually have dinner together as a family with no distractions. My husband and I sometimes talk about work or the world events, which actually encourages our daughter to put in some topic of her own 🙂
ChristyM says
This is great! When my kids were smaller I wanted to teach them to have better table manners, but sometimes we were out of things to talk about. We ended up doing progressive stories, but I think we may try this over the summer!
Erica MomandKiddo says
Progressive stories is a great idea, too.
Danielle says
Love it, will definitely give it a go! Our hit game was 'Truth or Porky', invented by the kids' English stepdad ('porky' is rhyming slang for 'lie'). We took turns either offering the most outlandish facts about the real world we could, or fabricating something, and the kids had to guess whether the fact was real or fake. It was a great way to share lots of weird and wonderful facts about natural science, astronomy and more.
Erica MomandKiddo says
Oh, that sounds fun!
Mya Dre says
The first time I tried this during lunch at home, my children enjoyed it immediately. We now play games at each meal - trivia, jigsaw puzzle assembly, word find, etc. We vary the subject matter, such as geography, Spanish language, history, etc. And, we occasionally use a dry erase board to keep score.
Meal planning and preparation has become slightly more pleasant. Meal times have become nourishing to our hearts and minds, as well as our bodies. Thank you so very kindly.
Erica says
Wonderful!