I've never felt the phrase "good job" was an adequate phrase to use when talking to Kiddo. Even though I try to avoid it, I still find myself saying it, which aggravates me. It's not that saying that "good job" is inherently bad, it's just that I want more meaningful conversation. This post eloquently expresses why "good job!" too often takes the place of more authentic interaction with our kids. She also mentions Alfie Kohn's Unconditional Parenting, which I think is one of the most thoughtful/thought-provoking parenting books I've ever read. It is worth reading, even if you might disagree with his main argument regarding punishments and rewards.